yes please, i would like some cheese with that whine.

i have two really big pet peeves that i would like to share with you.

1. people who are so grossed out by public restrooms that they either, a. lay 1,000 scraps of toilet paper on the seat to avoid direct contact or, b. hover over toilet seat to avoid direct contact.

this behavior results in forcing the person who uses the bathroom next to either, I. sweep the scraps, which are at this point probably covered in urine, into the toilet or, II. wipe the culprit's urine off of the toilet seat with a piece of toilet paper. i find these behaviors to be selfish and juvenile. and also, in the case of the 1,000 scraps, super wasteful. if you are that scared of a public toilet seat i suggest you carry an external catheter leg bag system as to not inconvenience non-neurotic restroom users.

2. people who have poor umbrella etiquette.

umbrella etiquette has gone the way of the buffalo folks. the large majority of umbrella-wielding citizens are so very concerned about getting wet that they have no respect for their non-umbrella carrying friends and neighbors. there are several ways this plays out 1. the umbrella user, burrowed deep beneath their plastic dome, spills the rain runoff from their umbrella onto an unsuspecting individual while they attempt to navigate umbrella congested streets, 2. the umbrella user, still safe beneath their umbrella, stabs an innocent bystander in the eye with the sharp wire of their horribly decrepit parasol 3. the umbrella carrier, now inside, rests their dripping umbrella on chairs and tables, leaving puddles everywhere. this behavior results in them staying dry and happy while soaking, mutilating and ruining the days of those who lack a bumbershoot.

these are the people who ruin my days, and i hate them for it.

happy fourth of july sirs and madams!

Lo siento, Roberto.

But life is boring, at least for me.

Example:

Yesterday I played The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time at the Space Machine for about ten hours straight. By myself. Sober. The only time I stopped was to go buy a 30 rack of beer which no one drank. Oh, and I stopped to go masturbate in Sam's room (just kidding... maybe.) If anything, it managed to keep my mind off of the fact that it was Valentine's Day. Fuck that shit. Plus I beat the Fire Temple, which was pretty rad.

Anyways, here's a list of things that I am looking forward to and may or may not feel like blogging about in the future:

• Morrissey's new album, Years of Refusal is coming out on Tuesday. Needless to say, I am excited.
• Voda is playing a show at the All Asia on February 27th. I expect you all to be there.
• I'm going to LA in mid March to visit my friend/college roomate Anthony. It will be my first time on the west coast. Personal goal: touch a fake breast.
• March 29th: I am seeing Morrissey in concert with Jeff. Chances of me turning gay(er) after the show: high.
• April 18th: Another Voda show at the Squealing Pig.
• May 23rd: MARYLAND DEATH FEST!!! METAL!!!
• I've started a new band with my friend Kyle and some metal dudes (METAL!!!) that I'm looking forward to.
• Seeing that they're all the rage these days, I'm entertaining the idea of getting some tattoos. More on that as it develops.

I think that's it. Boring.